Nov 10, 2010

Hey MORON!!!!

Last night was a disaster! I went to work about 8:30 at night down on Central and Osborne in downtown Phoenix. I was striping the parking lot of a 24 hour Walgreens. I was surrounded by tweakers! In the first 5 minutes I was there I saw one guy shoot up, and another one sniff crack and immediately throw up! The fun didn't stop there.... Not to be out done by his chunk-blowing companion yet another tweaker snorts some crack his self and then scales the wall of a dumpster enclosure and LITERALLY dumpster dives. He reapperared a few minutes later with a couple of broken halloween decorations and what looked to be rotten fruit. He of course put all of this in his custom made tweaker basket that sits on the front of his bike. Inside the baskset is the usual "tweaker tools." You know... a pair of wire cutters, a couple screw drivers, and a crappy pair of pliers.

HOWEVER... I wish I could tell you that dealing with tweakers was the worst part of my night. Unfortunately, they were sorely outdone by some greasy haired, black nailed, lip ring wearing, lifted truck driving, COMPLETELY WASTED, emo MORON!!!!

This toolbag decided he was gonna ignore the freekin caution tape stretching across the road and drive right over it! I was about 100 feet away around the corner when I heard a weird explosion. I walked around the corner and saw this truck driving at me....



Inside this truck was the aforementioned emo retard! This was our conversation as he rolled down his window and I stared in awe at his truck, now covered in white paint!
Emo: "Ohhhh bro.... (long drunken pause)... was that your paint can?"
Me: "Ya dude, look at your truck!"
Emo: "What happened did I get pain on it?" (Bare in mind it's all over his windshield too)
Me: "Are you kidding bro? It's freekin TRASHED!"
Emo: (After getting out of his truck and walking to the passenger side) "Wow, what did I hit? You got like a hose or something I could use?"
Me: (Still shaking my head in awe) "No I don't have a hose! Bro, didn't you see the freekin caution tape!? What the heck did you do, just drive right over it!?"
Emo: (As we both walk back towards the area where he ran over the can) "Well, what the f*$& is a paint can doing there?"
Me: (So angry by this point!) "Oh I don't know... maybe because I'M PAINTING! The whole road was taped off and you drove right over it!"
Emo: "I'm gonna look for a place to wash my truck on my phone."
Me: "Whatever you wanna do dude! If you get there quick it should come off pretty easy. Do me a favor though and don't move your truck for a bit cuz you're tracking paint everywhere you drive."
I then grabbed my camera and snapped that photo you saw above. Then out of the blue, the dude just takes off, continuing to smear paint out the other end of the parking lot!
Long story short I had to pack everything up, go back to storage, get the power washer, drive back and spent almost 5 hours cleaning up this dudes mess! I got back at almost 7 am. I was livid! All I can say is it's a good thing some tweaker didn't start bothering me while I was power washing or I would have been really tempted to throw punches! Here's some more pics of the damage! OH WHAT A NIGHT!


5 comments:

Bucket's List said...

WOW Scott. All I can say is wow.

Lindsay said...

what a douche.

Dawn said...

so sorry...guess you can be glad he didn't have a gun and decided to blame you for his stupidity!

Melanie and Ernie said...

as horrible as that sounds, at least you got the last laugh...so did i

Nick Sorensen said...

you're asleep, though i wouldn't be shocked if I just woke you up with my laughter. First time I read this I didn't read the dialogue. haha. this is why you need to blog more often. hilarious.